Untamed Chapter 10

One of the concepts that PCK doesn’t seem to have a firm grasp on is war. Of course, a lot of hacks don’t get it either. PCK is in good company with Paolini and any number of fantasy authors who learned what they know from watching Conan on repeat. The biggest question is, how can the vampires declare war on anyone?

That should require the vampires belong to a sovereign nation of their own. Do they have one of their own? Who governs it, how are they appointed and where is their country? Do fledglings get dual citizenship? Is Zoey still a U.S. citizen and a citizen of the Peoples Republic of Whampyrica? Do they have a seat in the U.N., a flag and a national anthem? Is the school part of the country or is it like an embassy?

Or maybe Neferet’s “war on humans” is like the “war on drugs” or the “war on terror”. More of an ideological battle with no conditions of victory. This will lead to a lot of vampiric PSAs. ‘This is your heart. This is your heart…on stakes! This message is brought to you by the council for vampire domination.’ When you start bandying about words like war, you’ve better have put more thought into it than you do your student’s grades, PCK.

We rejoin Zoey and pals, sitting around the table in silence. Zoey says that Neferet’s breakdown was odd. Really? It seemed rather commonplace to me considering how she ran around, tearing at her hair and screaming at the shadows during Zoey’s orientation. Zoey then wonders if the darkness Nyx warned her about was inside Neferet’s head. Shekinah then handwaves the odd outburst by saying that Neferet’s been having a rough month. She asks for the detective’s name and Ate says he’ll be contacted.

Police involvement is something I always love in bad fiction. Unless the hack in question is writing a police procedural, there’s never any research or sense applied.  It’s not like Marx is the only detective in Tulsa and, no doubt, he’s got other cases that need work. Unless they thought the murders tied into those of the football players, at which point the FBI should be involved as they have a serial killer on their hands. This would be bad for the vampires because the FBI has nice labs and do amazing things to crime scenes even after they’ve been “cleaned”. Lucky for PCK, the narrative won’t allow more than the one named policeman to show up, bumble around and not find much.

Sheky says that she’ll be hanging around until Neferet gets back to her old self, because that’s how that works. It’s like how the pope always fills in when a priest dies, just until they get a new one hired on and trained. Shek says that classes will resume tomorrow, Zoey says that they’re ready but they’re missing two instructors. Shek says that she’ll stick around to fill in for Loren teaching poetry, because how ever could the vampires survive if they didn’t study poetry? As for Nolan’s job, that will be filled in by Erik. They stopped him at the airport and brought him back to teach but it’ll only be temporary. You know, until Zoey gets tired of him.

Ohmygod, Erik is back and I’m taking a class he’s going to be teaching. I didn’t know if I wanted to cheer or puke, so I settled for silence and an upset stomach.

I’m sure Erik is looking forward to grading your work too, Zoey. Of course, maybe now he has a chance of getting laid now that he’s a professor and it’s taboo for vampires to bone fledglings. And how come Zoey must always physically feel her emotions? She almost never expresses them, they’re always just some sensation in her gut. The only time she does express them is when she cries.

Sheky also says that they’re going to remove the barrier from around the school. She says that would be basically declaring a siege state and that would be bad. They don’t need it because the “sons of erebus” are all the protection they need. Blah blah blah, just act like nothing’s happened, blah blah. Shouldn’t she be addressing this to the dozens, possibly hundreds, of students who don’t have magic? Naw, I’m sure the regular fledglings without Nyx looking over them constantly will be fine. Then because everyone must anticipate things for Zoey, Sheky asks if Zoey has something to add.

I gulped. “Well, I thought the Dark Daughters could contact the people who run Street Cats. It’s, uh, a charity that shelters homeless cats and finds them homes. I, well, I thought it might be a good way to mix with the human community,” I finished lamely.

Zoey’s plan to mix with the human community is to help cats. Yeah, that seems like the best way to earn goodwill among humans. There may be people out there who need housing or food or clothes but they’ll be comforted to know a bunch of stray cats are getting help. At least the crazy cat collectors will be able to relax knowing that someone out there will care for their two hundred feral, diseased rats once they die.

Ate says it’s not such a good idea but Aphro says that the humans won’t know if it’s fledglings or vampires helping out because they cover their marks. There’s nothing that earns people’s trust like wearing a disguise and helping cats. They’re willing to let them out as long as they take a “warrior” with them who’s also willing to cover their mark. Darius volunteers and they’re shocked he’d do that.

With that settled, Sheky dismisses them and they take about how impressive Sheky is. ‘Oh, she’s very impressive. So impressive she’s beyond description, or at least beyond further description considering that huge word dump that got plopped on the laps of the readers.’ Aphro talks about getting some alone time with Darius, Zoey’s servants call her a slut and she leaves.

With Aphro gone, the servants decide to make up with Zoey. They forgive her but say that she should have told them about everything, including the sex with Loren. The girls say that, maybe when she’s done grieving they’d like some details about Loren. Damien tells them to back off and give her privacy.

“Give the girl some privacy,” Damien said. “The Loren thing was very traumatic for her, what with the Imprint and the loss of virginity and Erik!”

There’s nothing more traumatic than the loss of virginity and Erik. Not the part where she was used sexually but where she lost her status symbol boytoy. It turns out that Erik has suddenly entered the room. He greets them all, being friendly to everyone and Zoey whines about how she sees nothing in his eyes. Then they says they heard he was going to be teaching drama, not that Zoey needs any lessons.

“I think Professor Nolan would be glad you’re going to do it,” I blurted before I could make my mouth shut up.

Zoey whines for a paragraph.

“Did you gain a new affinity?” His tone wasn’t outright hateful, but his words were definitely clipped and cold. “Can you speak to the dead now?”

Is this supposed to be banter? Because if it is, I’d like to return the unused portion for a full refund, to where do I send it? Erik says that he hopes she does like him filling in because she was his favorite teacher. Jack asks if that means they’re going to be roomies again and Erik has to remind him that he’s in the professor building, being an adult and all. Jack says that he forgot.

“Yeah, sometimes I almost forget myself,” Erik said. “Actually, I better get to my new place—I have boxes to unload and lesson plans to figure out. See you guys later.” He paused, and then his eyes flicked to mine. “Bye, Zoey.”

I like how he’s trying to sound wistful, like he’s just spent the past year being a full vampire but hasn’t come to grips with it. It’s only been, what, two days? They say their goodbyes and Erik leaves though Zoey’s farewell is inaudible because of drama, I guess. I can’t wait for the next exciting chapter where they share a moment of silence that lasts until they both apologize.