Ok, this is it. The last chapter of the book and there’s no epilogue. I have to offer a bit of grudging respect to PCK for not wasting my time with a prologue and an epilogue. That fact alone makes them better than Chris, Otis and Patterson combined. I hate bad stories but I hate it when authors imitate things without understanding them more. Like Chris drawing a map and Otis having a prologue. It’s a wonderful thought but they’re just going through the motions like a ritual, they don’t understand why they’re doing it. So either PCK is a little smarter or has a much better editor.
Now that Neferet has revealed herself she can step out of the shadows and start working. She lays hands on both Heath and Erik and casts heal minor wounds. Wait, what? It was probably just an assumption of mine but I thought vampires could only heal themselves or maybe other vampires. If they can heal people then why isn’t Neferet out working at a hospital? Why aren’t all vampires so talented healing the sick? No wonder human hate them. ‘Sure, we could heal people but that would take time away from redesigning our wardrobe.’
Neferet pats Erik on the head and tells him he showed the bravery of a vampire warrior by staying to protect Heath. Except for the fact that Erik didn’t do anything. The scene was just last chapter, PCK, he swatted and kicked at ghosts which was effective as trying to beat up fog. He didn’t stop them from trying to kill Heath. That would have required him helping Heath to his feet and getting him out of there. But no, Erik has to be special too or else he won’t be considered worthy enough to be Zoey’s consort.
And because PCK wasn’t done stealing from other people, Neferet can also alter memories. She grabs Heath and sort of heals him then says he’ll remember nothing but getting drunk and looking for Zoey. What about his magical crush on Zoey? Did she fix that too or does Neferet find it hilarious when humans fall under control of fledglings?
With no threat of death on the table, excluding me and some napalm, Neferet turns to face Aphrodite and begins whapping her in the face with a rolled up newspaper. ‘Bad Aphrodite! Bad! We don’t summon spirits and let them kill things! We kill them and let the spirits drink their lifeblood.’ Neferet says that it’s her fault—I agree—and that she’s known for years that Aphrodite was selfish and generally bad. She says that she was hoping age and the touch of the goddess would mature her.
Wait a second. If she’s about the same age as Zoey, and Zoey is a third year, that means that Neferet could only have known Aphrodite for three, maybe four years. And if she knew Aphrodite was selfish and mean, why did she put her in charge of the DDs? ‘Hmm, she’s mean and probably evil and hasn’t improved over the past two years. I know what to do. Aphrodite? I need to do something to straighten you out. How would you like to be in a position of authority?’
Neferet snatches the medallion/necklace Aphrodite is wearing and relieves her of her duties as head of the DDs. Then Neferet turns to Zoey and tells Zoey that she always knew she was special. Then Neferet looks at Zoey’s tattoos. And being as PCK has taken great pains to explains that their markings are tied to Nyx somehow, I’m going to assume that a rogue tattoo artist burst in, gave Zoey a tramp stamp and vanished into the shadows. Neferet remarks how extraordinary Zoey is a couple of times then gives her the necklace and everyone bows to her.
Here’s something I really love, Zoey never has to help with anything. Neferet tells Zoey to head back to the school because she’ll clean up there. Then she tells everyone that Zoey’s the new leader of the DDs and everyone cheers very loudly. It’s a good thing no one can hear the celebration or they might wonder what’s going on at the museum.
Everyone rushes Zoey and she motions for them to go ahead but tells her “friends” to stay with her. She tells Stevie that she was brave to volunteer for the snack. Stevie said she had to or else they wouldn’t have known where the ritual was. Ok, so that tells us how Stevie got there but what about the other three, PCK? Stevie texted Damien?
Wait, wait, wait. How did she figure out where they were? She had a sack on her head, just like Elliott did before. Did they make her walk there and then they drained her? Then why put the sack over her head? It seemed like they did that so the snack wouldn’t see what they were doing and where because they’re not actually part of the ritual. And since when did anyone in this book use a cell phone?
They get into a big group hug and then Erik asks to join them. Damien says yes and Erin tells him to stop flirting because Erik’s not gay. Then they shove Zoey out of the group hug and tell her to hug Erik because he saved her boyfriend. Zoey reiterates that Heath was her ex-boyfriend. That’s quickly forgotten when Erik touches her and so she gushes a bit about him which is stopped when he kisses her.
If this were a crappy sitcom this would be when the crowd is expected to cheer the couple. As it’s not, Zoey’s friends have to fill in for them. Then they decide to go get food because being snacked on make Stevie hungry. Zoey sends them on their own because she hears her stupid cat snuffling and says she’ll rejoin them in a second.
Zoey picks up the cat and pets it. Good to know, PCK. I was worried that the story would end and her cat would go without attention for five seconds. She asks why the cat followed her all that way this evening. Because someone in the DDs had a piece of chicken tucked in a pocket. Who knows and who cares. Then Aphrodite shows up and says that she may have won this round but it’s not over.
Yes, yes, Aphrodite. You’ll be back and you’ll get your revenge and Zoey’s little cat too. Zoey says that she didn’t win anything but that she was just trying to make things right. Unfortunately the spirits failed to kill Heath so she’s stuck with him for another book or two. Aphrodite says Zoey doesn’t understand—a more accurate statement she has never uttered—and that they’re all just pawns. This is PCK desperately trying to set up some tension before the book closes.
Zoey says it doesn’t have to be like this between them and Aphrodite says yes it does. Probably because Aphrodite realized long ago that she was put in the role of snotty blonde antagonist. Aphrodite says that it’s only going to get worse and Zoey asks what her vision was about earlier. Then Aphrodite runs off And Zoey tells her friends to let her go when they try to stop her. Stevie says that whatever happens they’re together and they all go back to school.
So I was wrong about Neferet being the real villain. Which is a real shame because that would have answered a lot of questions like how the hell Heath could find Zoey. And it would have explained why Neferet put Zoey in the DDs, because she was hoping she’d do something stupid like challenge Aphrodite, fail and then never rear her head again. ‘Oh no, Zoey, you should be the one to lead the DDs. Why don’t you challenge Aphrodite to a duel and take control of them. No, you don’t need to know how to use powers, you’ll just win because you’re better than everyone else.’
But no, sorry folks only one designated villain on the stage at any given time. All other must either be henchmen or must mend their ways and join the good side. Besides, Neferet likes cats and we all know how animals are an accurate judge of character.
*claps* I congrat you for finishing this aweful thing x-x you have alot of damn will power. It’s amazing just how crappy YA fiction has become, but this really does take the cake.
Great, so now Zoey’s the head cheerleader or whatever. was there a plot in any of that? I mean, what was the conflict? Aphrodite’s a big meanie, i guess.
so the big question–are you going to continue with the series (I hear there’s a lot of them)?
I guess the plot could be that Zoey becomes the Queen of the Darned because she’s the one true savior. And I’ll probably do more of them as time goes on. I think there are eight of them out or more, which means plenty of material.