Monthly Archives: November 2011

Inheritance Chapter 11

This chapter is called “no rest for the weary”. No, Chris, the saying is “no rest for the wicked”. That would be far more appropriate as that’s closer to what your characters are. Though “no rest for the douches” doesn’t … Continue reading

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Inheritance Chapter 10

This chapter is called “a cradle song”. Eragon is a dick. Yes, I’ve said it before and while it bears repeating I always like to examine the many forms, great and small, that Eragon’s dickishness takes. First though, I would … Continue reading

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Inheritance Chapter 9

This chapter is called “rudely into the light”. I can only imagine that’s Chris trying to hint that this chapter will be all about the birth of Elain’s kid. Can’t you feel your grip tightening on the edge of your … Continue reading

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Inheritance Chapter 8

So I know that Chris has used the pregnancy of the blacksmith’s wife, Elain, to sort of provide a timeline. Even if he doesn’t, that does set down a timeframe which is familiar to us, the audience. Approximately nine months, … Continue reading

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Inheritance Chapter 7

This chapter is called “what is a man”. Well, as the Count once famously told a Belmont “a miserable little pile of secrets”. In this chapter we rejoin Roran again. And because Chris has never learned how to “hook” readers, … Continue reading

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Inheritance Chapter 6

This chapter is called “memories of the dead”. I think I figured out the biggest problem with this fourth book. Besides that Chris is the author. It’s that you can clearly tell it shouldn’t exist. Chris barely had the motivation … Continue reading

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Inheritance Chapter 5

This chapter is called “after math”. I assume Chris is referring to the after math of his book release party. He probably had to call it a night pretty early. The five people who showed up hoping he was going … Continue reading

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Inheritance Chapter 4

This chapter is called “king cat”. I suppose that means one of the more annoying characters is going to show up in a moment. Chris will expect us to be surprised when Solembum, perhaps the most ridiculously named character to … Continue reading

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Inheritance Chapter 3

This chapter is called “shadows on the horizon”. No, no Chris. That’s more of a silhouette. Shadows are the things that get made when they’re in the way of light. I know, Chris, that’s just the same brilliance that got … Continue reading

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Inheritance Chapter 2

 So I don’t know if Chris figured this out but he’s just killed the entire book and series in chapter one. There’s no reason for me to continue on but I will because I’m persistent. Allow me to explain my … Continue reading

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