So why hasn’t the market for diamonds dropped out in Eragon’s universe? I mean, if Saphira can transform rock into diamond, sandstone no less which should lack the proper amount of carbon, then why can’t she do it for fun and profit? Hell, why didn’t Galbatorix do it when he first became king? Sure he’s stupid enough to try it, not realizing that the rarity is what makes diamonds valuable. Why can dragons even do that?
‘In other new, Galbatorix remains baffled at the economy’s current state. The self-styled king released a flood of sixty five million diamonds into the market last years causing the fine gems securities to collapse. In response to questioning, Galbatorix said quote “but they’re diamonds, that means they’re valuable and forever!” end quote. Now we head over to Tarek for sports.’
This chapter is called ‘capture at Gil’ead’. Oh look, Eragon will get taken unawares and captured. Haven’t we been through this before? And it’s not like it was a long time ago, near the front of the book. No, it was all of a few chapters back. Good job driving this story Chris.
Eragon and Murtagh talk about horses and how beautiful they are. Well, maybe when you ladies stop for the night you can brush each other’s hair and talk about which boys in your class are cute and not. They you can eat popcorn and gossip about the girls that didn’t get invited to your slumber party.
I don’t usually advocate crossovers, in fact I hate them, but I’m willing to make an exception here. I want to warp Bilbo into the story so he can stab Eragon for being such a loser.
‘Why, what a strange person you are. You wear no shoes and you’re incredibly short.’ ‘You’ve a very perceptive boy. Perhaps you’d like to try and solve my riddle. If you figure the answer there is a wonderful prize.’ ‘Oh, I love riddles. Especially the ones I find in my gum wrappers.’ ‘Charming. What leaks air then blood?’ ‘What? That doesn’t even make…oh god! You’ve stabbed me in the chest! I’m drowning in my own vital fluids!’
They ride, they sell Eragon’s horse, they don’t talk. Wow, there’s not much more interesting than people not talking. I just lives for long scenes where two people sit across from one another and sit in passive aggressive silence. It’s just like being home on Thanksgiving. They keep riding. They spar.
As he gulped air, Murtagh exclaimed, “You’re amazing! I’ve studied swordplay all my life, but never have I fought one like you. You could be the king’s weapon master if you wanted to.”
Aw, it looks like Eragon’s got a little bromance going. They train every night together. Afterwards Eragon practices the ‘ancient language’ quietly while Murtagh listens, only speaking to ask what some words mean.
They stop out side of Gil’ead and Murtagh gives us the ol’ ‘I’ve got a bad feeling about this’ bit. Eragon says he has to go because some Dromnad fellow will have to see the mark on his palm to prove he’s a rider. Yes, good point. Otherwise he might mistake you for just another nutcase who travels with a random dragon.
Murtagh and Saphira convince Eragon that Murtagh should go it alone. He does and then doesn’t come back. Or he comes back later than expected safe and sound. He setup the meeting and he ran into someone he ‘knows’ who will tell people Murtagh was there. Ohs noes! Wait, why does it matter again? Oh, that’s right. Because Murtagh has a secret, dark past which he’s trying to redeem himself from. Am I close Chris? Don’t break the string of clichés now.
Suddenly Saphira smells horses that aren’t moving. Yes, they’re the dead ones that Chris is beating further. They wait until night and are jumped by Urgals. They try to fight them off but one smacks Eragon in the head with a club just as he tells Saphira to fly off.
heh, that wouldn’t be such a hard stretch to throw Bilbo in there. Gandalf, in the process of leading Bilbo and the dwarves to defeat the dragon (Smog??) to claim his treasures, has his magic thrown off balance by the cosmic discovery of the Chosen One Eragon. The result is instead of Smog, they find Saphira, who has just turned a chunk of sandstone into a ginormous diamond. Hilarity ensues.
and ugh ugh ugh, really Murtagh? you may have studied the sword all you life, but it doesn’t sound like you’ve actually fought many people. Eragon’s had the sword all of a couple days? weeks?
Lifelong study of a skill means NOTHING in the face of Gary Stu powers!
Make some space, here comes another one of my brick comments!
1) Don’t feel guilty about the crossover. Paolini cribs Tolkien’s style so hard that the Inheritance universe and the LoTR universe probably have about a 95% overlap, so I bet you subconciously knew about it and Bilbo meeting Eragon came naturally. The main difference is in the dragons – Tolkien had old “classic” dragons like Smaug who were selfish and wicked and violent and greedy, while Paolini’s dragons are omnipotent scaly elves. (Off-topic: I hate the “Elves are always lawful good” trope. It was unaddressed Fantastic Racism to start with, and now it’s so overused. One of my favorite fantasies ever is Lords and Ladies by Terry Pratchett – the elves in that book are destructive, sociopathic and genocidal, while still being very recognizable as elves.)
2) About the diamond tomb – precisely how good would a diamond tomb be for preserving the body? Sure the environment is probably airless, but bacteria in the Archea domain love airless environments, and Brom’s body definitely wasn’t sterile when he was entombed. Even embalmed corpses decay eventually. What will the tomb look like to people happening upon that spot in a hundred years or so? A disgusting rotten corpse suspended in diamond? A skeleton suspended in diamond?
3) Again about the diamond tomb: good point about sandstone not having enough carbon to make for good diamonds. Then again, didn’t Eragon manage to convert a small amount of dirt into water earlier? (or maybe later, so SPOILER ALERT, but it definitely happened) So apparently elements can be changed using magic. Though, once again, this is probably just something Paolini just put in because it was cool.
without a place for decaying matter to leech through, the tomb would probably just have a disgusting puddle of goo in the middle, with skeletal crunchy bits peeking through.
but now i wonder are dragons master alchemists as well? assuming it’s not just sandstone into diamonds, it sounds like, as ChocolateSamus said, she can turn elements. in which case how the f*&^% did she get caught in chains??
I wonder how come she didn’t slash or bite at the Ra’zac when they tried to chain her up. I mean, there was only two of them. I’m pretty sure a dragon of her size could have killed at least one of them. Let alone being able to screw with elements by purring at them.
Of course we’re just supposed to go with it because it’s magic. Also, Pratchett’s take on elves was awesome.
This popped up on my Facebook page as an ad and I had to share:
Gotta love those reimaginings.