Host Chapter Forty Nine

I love how Otis does such a good job of making us care about each character. That way, it’s so much more poignant when one of them dies. It’s really one of the few skills Otis seems to have mastered between the hanging chapter and the tedium.

Take Wes for example. He was vital to the plot. Without him would Eve have ever discovered her love for the javelin toss? And I say to you, who was the man that began the ever important slow clap at the end of chapter twenty six? And who can forget when he suddenly became one of the good guys, clotheslined a ‘seeker’ and told Eve to give them hell?

Oh wait, I don’t remember Wes doing anything. In fact, as soon as Jamie said something about Wes I started racking my brain trying to remember if there was even anybody named Wes in this book. After drawing up Wesley Snipes as Simon Phoenix over and over, I broke down and searched my recaps, hoping for a hit. Ah yes, the happy couple from chapter thirty nine. I didn’t care then and I doubly don’t care now.

I’m sure Otis will try to make us feel something vicariously through Eve. That means she’ll be brooding for a few pages before the real ‘climax’ starts up. Which will be a climax in the same way a raccoon hobbling down the street is a masked villain. In the meantime everyone will swallow their emotion and pat Eve on the head and tell her how special she really is.

This chapter is called ‘interrogated’. I can only hope it’ll be something visceral done to Eve in the name of protecting the remaining humans. Maybe someone will take a page out of the Hostel book and blowtorch the Crunchy out of Jackie Otis.

Well, when Otis steals she does from the best. Eve instantly comes down with lady Macbeth syndrome. She starts dry washing her hands until the skin is chapped and the bleeding which drives her over the brink of madness. She grabs a knife from the kitchen and proceeds to end humanity’s last shot at independence not counting that one with Bill Pullman. Now that Eve has something to feel guilty about, the other characters should start playing pet the alien right about…now.

Oh, I hate it when I’m right. It means I’ve started to get into the head of a woman who doesn’t have room in there for a anything bigger than a neutrino. That would explain the headaches and sudden periods of missing time though.

Jaime pats her on the back while she cries. Hey, how about Lily? She seemed rather fond of the cannon fodder man. Doesn’t her grief count for a little more than Eve’s? I mean, it’s not like Eve just watched some alien kill her boyfriend. I’m sure that Lily will wander along any second and offer her comfort though.

This is the kind of thing that makes me ask how they ever took over a single planet. Half of what they do is cry and pout and the other half is to be more vulnerable than an Argentine Horned frog in the middle of the Arctic Ocean while getting a light pat on the butt. How do these alien work up the nerve to lace their shoes if their mommy isn’t badgering them to get moving so they’re not late to soccer practice?

Finally, the antagonist shows up. Maybe Otis keeps giving them the wrong times and that’s why they show up late to everything. ‘Oh, hey guys what’s going on?’ ‘Oh hey yourself. Just where the hell were you?’ ‘Uh, driving over here?’ ‘No, I meant earlier. We started at seven AM.’ ‘Huh, the note I got from Otis says ten PM.’ ‘Let me see that. Well what do you know? It does.’

So HK finally makes a bodily appearance. She’s in Eve’s old makeshift cell for the moment. Which is great because who could possibly sneak out of a room with no bars and only a quarter competent guard watching over her?

Jackie Otis joins in with the rest again and tells Eve it’s not her fault. Is anything she does her fault I wonder? ‘Oh no! I pour gasoline on over the orphanage and lit it with a thrown cigarette!’ ‘There, there Eve. That could of happened to anyone who was carrying lit cigarettes and a jerry can. Those orphans shouldn’t have been there anyway.’

So why did I feel as though I was at the disadvantage? Why this strange premonition that she would be the one to walk away from our confrontation?

Because you’ve peeked ahead in the book? Bad Eve, you’re not supposed to use player character knowledge to make in game decisions. The GM should fine you some experience for that.

Eve debates whether she wants to talk to HK. Eve decides to talk to HK. The human guards talk about HK. I. Don’t. Care. You’ve dragged this out long enough Otis. HK’s head had better be full of plot spiders that’ll get released and start making thing happen the second Eve steps into the room.

Oh and not that this will come up later, I’m sure, but an exit to the caves is a couple of paces from the ‘prison cell’. Not that it has any relevance to anything whatsoever. In fact, I’m not even sure why I brought it up. I should really get back to cleaning that gun or Chekhov is going to be mad.

They bore the audience with some talk about why and who and some insults lobbed at humans. Oh, big surprise, HK came alone because nobody believed her. That means the status quo won’t change when she comes up missing because how dare you try and suggest that things change whether we like it or not.

Eve, being the idiot she is, decides she wants to save HK. Why, I don’t know. Maybe because Otis couldn’t see another way to make anything happen. Besides, this way HK gets to make a nuisance of herself and act as the instrument of the author for dishing out some penance. The chapter ends with HK giving Eve a stern look while Eve says it’ll take a life for a life. Oh, please no Otis I’m so scared.

<<Chapter Forty Eight

Chapter Fifty>>

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