Host Chapter One

You know, in spite of having actual copies of these books to go over, I never trust them. In every book I’ve read by Otis there comes a moment where I don’t believe what I’m reading. I think that this has to an edited version. Someone had to have printed a few pages of their own out and pasted them in place of the actual content.

As such I usually note the page number(s) and take my next opportunity to wander into a book store and examine the stock of my nearest B&N or Borders. I have to wonder if the employees are getting worried by always seeing me in there, furtively grabbing a Stephanie Meyer book, plopping down on the floor and then shaking my head as I read.

And right off we’re back to the juvenile first person narrative. Something I’ve noticed is that new authors, or new writers I should say, tend to gravitate towards the first person narrative right off. That’s because it’s easy to do, you simply talk at your audience as if you were a character. That simplicity comes at a price though in you’re limited by the scope of their vision, both author and character.

My thoughts are that third person narrative is hard to do but easier to get right, the form makes you learn it. Whereas first person narrative is easy to do and hard to get right. Simply an observation of mine.

I’d wager a penny that Otis is a journal keeper and that’s why she sticks to first person narrative, not just because she’s less than an amateur. Deer diairy, hd a dreem abut a vamp lst nite. He waz hawt and wntd two bight me n it waz totes scury n hawt. I tink I shuld wright it down caus it waz hawt n I wnt to chare it wit everbody.

Right off we have Parasite Eve getting used to her new boddy. Walking around, looking at things and practicing her ‘language’. The first thing she does is ask for a cigarette and then a shot of whiskey which she misidentifies the most nutritious foodstuffs of humankind.

By the way, these aliens don’t know what smells are. Yes apparently after being seven different creatures, one of which was a dragon, Eve is just discovering glade plugins. She gets hit by a memory and survives, much to my disappointment.

There are bad memories and bad smells and then a loud piercing thing which her body tells her is a scream. Ah, Otis recalls her time at San Diego Comic Con. Those memories terrify me also to this day, Eve is right to be frightened.

The phrase ‘there is danger’ is so oft repeated at this point that if I was taking shots I’d be in a coma and unable to finish the recap. Really Otis, you need to expand your vocabulary a little. There are other ways to express the same thought. Take a creative writing course or something.

The body, whom I shall call Jackie Kennedy because she was rumored to be a charming Host(Ha!), somehow ended up in an abandoned building. I guess the in crowd Jackie belonged to decided to go make fun of transients for not being able to vote and things just got out of hand. She jumped down an empty elevator shaft and killed herself. Why can’t Otis emulate her heroine?

Eve manages to remember a face and it belongs to Jackie. Jackie is talking to Eve which shouldn’t be happening. As it is anyway I suddenly feel plunged into an intergalactic sitcom. ‘What happens when two people try to share the same body? Find out this fall on ABC’s Imperfect Strangers.’ Small detail, Jackie is of course pretty.

Eve gets mad that someone else is sharing her space. She promptly tattoos a line down the body and tells Jackie to stick to her half. Eve thinks she’s won because she has the head and upper torso. Just wait and see what happens when they need to go to the bathroom.

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Chapter Two>>